Sunday, October 9, 2011

Staying in the family way.

When we embark on a journey of personal development many people benefit from our emotional courage.  

You know when you've heard something many times but then one day you really understand it?  One of my teachers, Chuck Spezzano, always says that when we heal, we never do so alone.  I have heard him say this many times but the other day I experienced it at a new level.

During a recent workshop we did a powerful Family Bonding exercise.  This is when a focus person chooses someone to represent a quality they felt was missing from their original family - in this exercise the quality was Understanding.  The focus person then chooses other participants to represent the members of his/her original family and brings each member to the centre of the room where the person representing Understanding gathers them together.  The purpose of the exercise is to create a new emotional experience of our original family and reframe our emotional memory.  

It was during this exercise that I understood Chuck's message anew.  I think there are three elements to it.  Firstly, by remembering the love we feel for our family - even through a virtual, role-play exercise - we initiate a healing process for the whole family.   

Secondly, those of us either participating in or witnessing the exercise were reminded that, in our heart of hearts, all we want is for our families to feel loving and close.  So not only did the focus person start to heal their emotional wound, everyone on the workshop also gained a new understanding of the power of love.

Thirdly, buried under the pain of any experience or memory from our childhood hides a gift, a quality we have forgotten we still possess.  When the goal is to retrieve our innate gifts, the emotional pain that has in the past prevented us from operating at our best, can instead be used to drive us toward a happy outcome - the rediscovery of those unique gifts and talents. Our present relationships benefit as a result of our renewed confidence and self-worth. 

Are you ready to heal those old beliefs and events and re-discover your unique gifts and talents?  Check our our monthly workshops or contact me at  to find out more.

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